If a hug represents how much I love you, I would hold you in my arms forever Mandy Hampton
What is love, where did it come from, is it worth the heart ache that almost always comes with it. Although the word love is mentioned at least several times in every book of the bible except a few, it is mentioned in the book of psalms many more times than all the other books. 1 Corinthians 13:4 NIV says, love is patient, and love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. Love is patient, understanding, kind and unselfishness (2 Corinthians 6.6) Ok, so there are a few words that describe love.
It is said that love comes from God who is in us. If that is true, then the more God/love that is in someone, the more painful the heart ache would be from a failed love, right? Well, not quite, if love is all forgiving, because we would be expected to immediately forgive those who hurt us. But why is it we can't do that? All of us need time to heal, and it's only after some time has passed, that our capacity to forgive will outweigh our feelings of hate and anger towards someone who has hurt us. Only time can heal a broken heart and nothing else. Does "don't do the crime unless you are willing to do the time", sound familiar? But yet it feels so good when we are in love.
Maybe it’s like yen and yang, love and pain, you can't have one without the other. What is the secular take on love? From the movie Captain Corelli's Mandolin: When you fall in love, it is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake, and then it subsides. And when it subsides, you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, and it is not the desire to mate every second of the day. It is not lying awake at night imagining that he is kissing every part of your body. No... Don’t blush. I am telling you some truths. For that is just being in love; which any of us can convince ourselves we are. Love itself is what is left over, when being in love has burned away... (Iannis to Pelagia) Note: there are two versions of this quote, one from the book and a slightly different version from the movie.
Well that is definitely another description of love and a pretty good one. I remember an old flame once told me as she was leaving: It's not that I don't love you anymore; it's just that I'm not in love with you anymore. I guess what she was trying to say was that our roots never entwined enough to warrant a continued stay, after the honey moon ended and real life began. On a serious note, however, many people that I spoke to before writing this article were asked: Do you believe in love? You know what the most common answer was? "People abuse love" "You’re taking a big risk by allowing yourself to love someone". Some men said: “It's not worth the risk anymore; even the laws of the land punish you for it.” While that may be partly exaggeration, it is at least partly true to many American men who have been mis-treated by the countries divorce proceedings in its’ court rooms regarding their children and their income.
Scientists have learned that a chemical cocktail of neurotransmitters — phenethylamine, dopamine, norepinephrine and oxytocin — are at work when we fall for someone. This powerful love potion is secreted when we feel that initial attraction and serves as an amphetamine, elevating our mood, keeping senses on high alert, and helping us bond with another person. Once smitten, these “love” chemicals surge and their health effects are set in motion. Some people, are particularly hard-hit. Here’s a few of love’s side effects. Can't sleep, can't eat, and can’t concentrate, chest pressure, nausea and butterflies. They don’t call it lovesick for nothing. Falling in love affects your brain about the same way as smoking crack,” says Ethlie Ann Vare, author of “Love Addict: Sex, Romance, and Other Dangerous Drugs. “It has essentially the same effect on what’s called the reward center of the brain.” (retrieved from; http://on.today.com/nf9owt)
Here's what I think. I think love is like a muscle, if you don't use it, you lose it. I also think love is the most important emotion we have in us, and I don't think the foolishness of a few hurtful (sometimes a person who hurts you is just ignorant for lack of a better way to have handled the matter) people that have crossed our paths, is evidence enough to abandon something as beautiful as love is. I have loved and lost at least twice in my life and believe me, it hurt like hell, and I still can't wait to find love again.
Scientists have learned that a chemical cocktail of neurotransmitters — phenethylamine, dopamine, norepinephrine and oxytocin — are at work when we fall for someone. This powerful love potion is secreted when we feel that initial attraction and serves as an amphetamine, elevating our mood, keeping senses on high alert, and helping us bond with another person. Once smitten, these “love” chemicals surge and their health effects are set in motion. Some people, are particularly hard-hit. Here’s a few of love’s side effects. Can't sleep, can't eat, and can’t concentrate, chest pressure, nausea and butterflies. They don’t call it lovesick for nothing. Falling in love affects your brain about the same way as smoking crack,” says Ethlie Ann Vare, author of “Love Addict: Sex, Romance, and Other Dangerous Drugs. “It has essentially the same effect on what’s called the reward center of the brain.” (retrieved from; http://on.today.com/nf9owt)
Here's what I think. I think love is like a muscle, if you don't use it, you lose it. I also think love is the most important emotion we have in us, and I don't think the foolishness of a few hurtful (sometimes a person who hurts you is just ignorant for lack of a better way to have handled the matter) people that have crossed our paths, is evidence enough to abandon something as beautiful as love is. I have loved and lost at least twice in my life and believe me, it hurt like hell, and I still can't wait to find love again.
At least I still have the capacity to love. Never lose your capacity to love; you never know when you might need it again. To find someone you can love romantically or fall in love with (they are both the same to me) is a blessing. What I've learned, is to just know to be careful choosing that someone to love, an even being careful you may get hurt again. Give the things you need to know about a person at least a couple of years to come out, whatever those things might be, before you let go of yourself and fall in love with them. This will help.
A small voice always speaks to you and tells you what you need to know about a person. You just have to discipline yourself to listen to that small voice and respond in your own best interest, just be sure you do respond. If that voice says this person is tricky, don't ignore that voice, it's there for a reason. Find out what tricky is, and determine if it's something you are willing to accept in your life from a mate. If not, sign out and start over again, you'll be glad you did.
Are you a romantic like me? I have a site you might like: http://www.1-love-quotes.com/
More on this subject: http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/44010532
Are you a romantic like me? I have a site you might like: http://www.1-love-quotes.com/
More on this subject: http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/44010532
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